How to Navigate Loss
While watching the fires whip through so many parts of Los Angeles on January 7th, I was reminded that life is a series of losses. Just two days before I was sitting in one of those lovely homes in Pacific Palisades overlooking the ocean with my boyfriend, enjoying a Sunday afternoon. Unbeknownst to us that a mere two days later we would be watching the news reports as the fires ripped through his neighborhood, destroying everything in its wake. One day he had a home and belongings, the next, everything was gone! He is just one of MANY.
Nothing is permanent and the things that we most value or esteem will slip through our grasp time and again. Our looks, people we love, activities we enjoy, finances, our sharp minds, or even our homes with all of our belongings.
If we take an honest look at the people, places, things and situations we have experienced over time; it’s all about loss. My once beautiful beach community, now black and smoldering, or the current political climate that many fear will cause them to lose their basic human rights; nothing is guaranteed.
According to numerology the year 2025 equals the number 9 (2+0+2+5 = 9) and the number 9 signifies completions and endings. Never have I seen a more dramatic representation of this as I did watching those fires spread. Interestingly enough, according to Chinese astrology, it is also the year of the snake, and as we know, the snake sheds its skin as it grows. So as traumatic as loss feels, it initiates growth with the ability to open new chapters. Yes, we will forever be changed from our various losses, but none of this has to be in vain, because through these people and experiences, we can gain much. Therefore, even if things do not stay the same, we have the ability to walk away with a deeper appreciation for what remains in our lives.
Life is meant to be lived and experienced. Yet if anything is true, one door must shut before another can open; we must finish reading the current chapter before getting the most out of the next. We may not see the entire picture, and so these losses we experience often seem like the end. But there are always new people, places, situations and experiences on the horizon, so our loss, is really just gain in another direction. Therefore, life is about loss, but it is also about constantly receiving. I have seen so many people pour their love, time, resources and money into those who are currently in need, and it reminds me of how tragedy has a lovely way of bringing out the best in humans. As Alexandre Dumas chose to close his famous work The Count of Monte Cristo, “All human wisdom is summed up in two words, wait and hope.”